Saturday, September 23, 2006

More Misery Memoirs Fakes ......

Looks like Anya may have to spice up her work of fiction about her supposedly cruel and heartless upbringing as more wannabe authors are crawling out of the woodwork to add to the bucketloads of misery memoirs that are the current flavour of the month in literary circles. Mainstream Publishing published Kathy's Story, a supposed biographical account by Kathy O'Beirne of her terrible upbringing where she allegedly;
  • Had her hand put in the crack of a door while her father pressed against it until the pain made her pass out
  • Had her hand held in a pan of hot grease as a child
  • Was beaten by her father with a belt until the wounds turned septic
  • Was raped in a Convent when 14
  • Had a baby as a result of the rape which was stolen away by the nuns in the convent
Heart tugging stuff. Except a few people have said it's all a load of bollocks. People such as her 5 bothers and sisters who have claimed the book is a "hoax publication'. People like the Nuns who run the Convent who have met with Kathy prior to the publication of her book and are now considering suing over the allegations. At a press conference held by the family, they refuted yet another claim by Kathy that she was adopted by producing her birth certificate. This also laid to rest claims that Kathy was 45 when her birth certificate showed her to be 50. And yet 350,000 copies of the book have been sold (no doubt earning a pretty penny for the author). Looks like Anya will have to "up the stakes" as she is penning her own version of dark and lurid tales of her childhood, if she expects to compete in this murky world of fiction. Perhaps she was raped by the Pope who flew into her window on a flying saucer........ A simple tale of "lost my job, lived in a car for a bit, got a book deal" just won't cut it in todays demanding market.

Friday, September 22, 2006

Geography

"...to talk about this book and sit with him in Yeat’s tower, in almost the exact middle of Ireland" So waffles our (non) homeless heroine in her last post of August (with yet another gap of at least a month before anything more). One of my loyal readers happened to mention in my comments section that Yeats Tower wasn't in the centre of Ireland. Surely, as Anya stated such affinity with the Emerald Isle, she couldn't be so wrong. After all, could it have been mentioned for the purposes of literary prose and to make the story more appealing (much like the lie about being homeless)? So I popped onto the AA route planner for Ireland and typed in the lcation of Yeats Tower and the location of the exact centre of Ireland which (as everybody knows) is Tullamore. Blimey !! 73 miles apart. Mind you, the width of Ireland at its widest point is 170 miles so that would make Anyas' calculation out by about about a third of the entire country. Hmmmm.. I guess geography wasn't a strong point in her schooling. Let's hope she doesn't just make stuff up in her book for dramatic effect, like she does in her blog, eh readers !!

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Wherefore art the Con Artist now ......

With yet another extended absence from her blog, the Anya-sickofants must be wondering where she's got to now.
  • Perhaps another International jaunt to introduce the readers to yet more characters who will appear in her book.....
  • Or maybe she's just nipped off to knock up a quick book of poetry with her dad...
Awwww.. I can picture her next blog entry now. "And as the sun sank slowly beneath the horizon like a great big sinky thing on fire in the sky, I lay my head on daddies lap in the appley green orchard full of green appley apples that reminded me of small round fruits hanging from trees. As Daddy quoted Keats and Shelley to me, I was reminded of happier times in my past when my nannies would tuck me up in my four poster bed and recite Byron and Chaucer to me as I snuggled beneath the freezing sheets, wrapped only in some towels and an ermine coat my mother had given me for my fourth birthday. If only I had been aware of the terrible heart breaky events that I would experience in the future, it would have taken the shine off my forthcoming trip to that Swiss finishing school...."